The here & now and I have a tumultuous relationship. I rarely want to be here, now. Struggling to be in the present, you can imagine how well I handle change. Not very. (Unless, of course, it’s change that I planned. You other Type A’ers know exactly what I’m talking about.)
It isn’t just me that struggles, though. Everyone seems to struggle when change bucks their ideas about the here & now; even about what you should be doing right here, right now.
My husband and I got married a little too soon, for example. “You’re so young,” people said, “don’t you want to see who else you might meet before settling?”
And we started making babies a little soon. “Well you didn’t waste much time did you? Was it an accident?”
And then we told people that we’d made a baby a little soon. “Just 7 weeks along? You’re making it public a little early, don’t you think? What if something happens?”
What if something happens? What if something happens? Maybe the reason I struggle – like many others – to live in the here & now is because we are too wrapped up in the land of what if. In the land of what if, we are incapable of embracing the here & now.
What if anxiously anticipates future problems. The here & now has no such expectations.
What if is often wrought with worry. Here & now is often filled with hope.
What if is never satisfied, here & now is completely so.
Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t arrived. I’m not sure the train has even left the station. What I do see more clearly than ever is that life bursts about the here & now. I don’t want to miss it.
I want to be here, now.