Relationship statuses abound: single, engaged, married, divorced, jaded. You might be feeling blessed, happy, stressed; or you could just be checking in. The people who have kids wish they didn’t, and those who don’t wish they did. Opinions abound, especially those that are unsolicited. I won’t play Candy Crush Saga. I will, however, wish you a very happy birthday even though I can’t quite remember how we know each other. Throw in a few cat photos, an inspirational quote, about ten selfies, and one meme that is genuinely hilarious and you’ve got a pretty full news feed. Full of what? It’s hard to say. I just know that thanks to the all-observing blue and white dashboard I don’t have time for anything else, other than to post an update about how busy I am.